two years

It's the day after the two year anniversary since Thailand and you were struck by lightning.
I was okay for the whole day until I said out loud what day it was and then I cried. I miss you.
Thank you for everything you did. For teaching me, guiding me, making fun of me, sharing with me, inspiring me. You were such a special light in all of our lives and I know that I wouldn't be the same if you hadn't had walked into my life.

I still remember your testimony, I still remember you telling me my school jumper was on fire and I thought you were kidding when you weren't, I still remember you teasing me about my height (constantly), I still remember you offering to help me with opportunities in my future.

I remember so clearly what I was doing when I found out what had happened. It was the last night of ballet concert and we were just about to go on for the finale/curtain call. Kirsty was waiting outside the senior's dressing room and when I walked past heading to the wings she called out that she needed to talk to me after the show.

After the show I went to the senior's dressing room to see that she wanted to talk about and she was crying. I thought at first it was because it was her last concert with SDA but then she showed me her phone. And I read the message on the screen and I didn't know what to think. I actually couldn't believe it and at first I couldn't cry. I had tears but I was just feeling so numb that I wasn't sure if they were forced or not. People I didn't know were hugging me, Kirsty and I were hugging each other. I just wanted to go home and curl up into a ball.

Megan came in looking for me (Erica was taking me home) and she didn't know what had happened. Erica did though (Kelly had sent her a message and told Erica not to tell me until after the show) and she took me home immediately, Megan holding my hand the entire time. Erica walked me to the door and hugged me, then passed me to my parents and sister who had already heard.

I got rid of my make up, took out my hair, took a shower and cried the entire time. I cried myself to sleep. I didn't go to church the next morning and I cried when I woke up. Michelle called me from Thailand later that day in tears and I felt so bad that I couldn't hug one of my best friends.

We had your memorial service about a week later. Kirsty and I went to Cottesloe after and we just sat and talked. We went and bought some of your favourite things - tea and chilli among other things - and when the sun was setting, we threw them into the ocean because that was another thing you loved - fishing and the outdoors. There were other people there but we kept to ourselves. We were all there to celebrate you. You were such a strong man of God and inspired every single one of us - we wouldn't have been there otherwise.

I don't know why God chose to send you home then but I'm just so grateful that he sent you into mine and other peoples' lives. I will never forget you nor what you taught me and how you inspired me. Thank you. I know you're in a way better place with infinitely cooler people and that I'll be seeing you again. So until then, I'll be trying to live life the way you did.